It hasn’t been until recently that I’ve felt a strong pull in my life back to Him… Not sure if it’s because of the state my life is in, but nonetheless it’s pulling me! The one thing I’m continuing to struggle with is straying from the path He laid out for me. I understand free will and the choices we have from the very minimal to the extreme and life changing, but my question recently has been, what do you do when you realize you’ve made the wrong decision?
Depending on the decision made this can be a very difficult or very easy task… Returning an impulse buy is one thing, getting a divorce is another.
I love my husband dearly, but we are very, very different people. I always thought that love was enough to keep people together, to build a life upon that foundation. We haven’t even reached our one year yet and sometimes I wonder if we will. We don’t argue about monumental things, there hasn’t been any sort of infidelity, we both still love each other… But, we come from very different view points in life and I feel, at times, as though we are headed in two totally different directions.
I am a thinker, analyzer by nature, to a fault! And I have definitely analyzed our marriage and relationship to death, we are looking into going into marriage counseling but there is a voice in the back of my head telling me that it is futile. I wish in an odd way that there was something irrevocably broken in our marriage, a reason or excuse as to why it is not working. But deep down I know why it isn’t, this is not the path God intended for me. My husband is not the man God intended for me to marry. I cringe as I re-read that sentence, and I pray that God can turn something that wasn’t His plan into something that is…
